The paths you travel...

I have come to think of life as being a series of paths.

I have many regrets in my life, have made poor choices in how to face something or what action to take. I’m quite sure that everyone has regrets they face.

I have not been known to choose what seemed at the time to be the best path to take, if I had done this I could be this by now. If I had gone there, instead of here it might have turned out better. It is one of the great mysteries in life….”woulda, coulda, shoulda”…if you do a Google search putting that in there is quite a bit that comes up.

How are we to know if our lives truly would have turned out better? How do we know we weren’t meant to be right where we are at each given moment?

Yeah, if only I had not taken a buy out from GM I could be close to retirement. Yeah, if only I had gone to college right after high school I would not have had to take as much math, and likely would be in a better paying job. Yeah, if only I had not trusted someone I would not have gotten burned. How many people really can’t say – “yeah, if only” about a few things.

Maybe there is some sort of cosmic fate that is in store for us each which guides us along the way. Maybe we really aren’t the ones making the choices…

“Robert Frost” makes one think about life with his poem:

“The Road Not Taken”.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

I do think that life happens the way it does for a reason. I was fortunate to have had loving and supporting parents or my paths would have been bumpier.

I am thankful for the paths that led me to my husband. I did not marry until I was 42, which meant I missed out on being a mother, but, maybe I wasn’t meant to be one. I do have a beautiful niece that I love as a daughter. I have two beautiful step-daughters that I love very much. Maybe that is as much of a parent as I was meant to be.

This song by “Rascal Flatts” always makes me think of my life and my husband:

"Bless The Broken Road"

I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you

[Chorus]
Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like Northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

I think about the years I spent just passing through
I'd like to have the time I lost and give it back to you
But you just smile and take my hand
You've been there you understand
It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true

[Chorus]
Now I'm just rolling home
Into my lover's arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you.

Life is a mystery, at times it can be a maze. We all find our way out of the maze at some point in our lives, and sometimes we just go back into it at another entrance. I have been mulling this over, and over in my head and I’m not sure if all this will make sense to anyone but me. If not than it is just a little exercise for my brain. I hope though that you are reading this and maybe, just maybe seeing some new appreciation for the paths you travelled.